BEGINNING YOUR STORY WITH SETTING? By Ronda Hinrichsen

If an author cares whether or not his manuscript is read and/or bought, he or she must instantly catch the reader’s attention. For that reason, until the last year or two, I wrote with the belief that all stories must begin with a scene which shows what happens to the main character on the day everything changes, i.e., the inciting incident. By contrast, I also believed beginning a story with long, detailed descriptions of the setting killed the story, because people like me either immediately closed the book or fell asleep reading about sunsets and mountain peaks.If you’ve had those same beliefs, listen up. Yes, action, as I earlier described, is an important element of a good beginning, but I now realize setting is too, only--and here’s the critical part--that setting needs to be included within the action.

Why? Because a well-drawn up setting helps transport readers to your character's world. Don't believe me? Consider the following first paragraphs from two of my favorite best-selling novels: In each case, the characters are in the middle of a physical action on the day everything changes.

Princess Academy, Shannon Hale

Miri woke to the insistent bleat of a goat. She squeaked open one eye. Pale yellow sky slipped through the cracks in the shutters. It was day—the very day trade wagons might come to carry her off. She’d been expecting them all week with both a skipping heart and a falling stomach. Strange, lately, how many things made her feel two opposite ways twisted together (Hale, 2005, p. 1).

The Hunger Games, Suzanne Collins

When I wake up, the other side of the bed is cold. My fingers stretch out, seeking Prim’s warmth but finding only the rough canvas cover of the mattress. She must have had bad dreams and climbed in with our mother. Of course, she did. This is the day of the reaping (Collins, 2008, p. 3).

In each paragraph, the author slips the setting into the action in such a way that we hardly notice it, and yet we get a clear picture of what is happening in the story at that moment. We are also immediately drawn into the character's world. The main tools the authors use to accomplish this are specific details. Details, details, details. We hear that phrase all the time, and yet it truly is the key to fleshed-out writing. And those details are not limited to the physical. Both of the above examples also incorporate a detail from at least one other of the five senses. Also, and perhaps most importantly, those details hint at the POV character's current emotion. 

With that understanding, now look at those same two paragraphs. Only this time, I've highlighted the specific setting details. 

Princess Academy, Shannon Hale

Miri woke to the insistent bleat of a goat. She squeaked open one eye. Pale yellow sky slipped through the cracks in the shutters. It was day—the very day trade wagons might come to carry her off. She’d been expecting them all week with both a skipping heart and a falling stomach. Strange, lately, how many things made her feel two opposite ways twisted together (Hale, 2005, p. 1).

The Hunger Games, Suzanne Collins

When I wake up, the other side of the bed is cold. My fingers stretch out, seeking Prim’s warmth but finding only the rough canvas cover of the mattress. She must have had bad dreams and climbed in with our mother. Of course, she did. This is the day of the reaping (Collins, 2008, p. 3).

In the example from The Hunger Games, I highlighted "our mother" and "day of the reaping" because, to me, they add to the setting; but I highlighted it with a different color, because you may not agree with me. However, whether you agree with me or not does not matter nearly as much as whether or not you understand that Beginnings do begin with Setting. And character. And action. And emotion. With all of them working together to pull readers into the authors' worlds. 

Works Cited

Collins, S. (2008). The Hunger Games. New York: Scholastic Press.

Hale, S. (2005). Princess Academy. New York: Bloomsbury Publishing, Children's Books.

Interview with Linda Weaver Clarke on Writing the Amelia Moor Detective Series by Ronda Hinrichsen

I'm always working on my writing craft, and one of the ways I do that is studying how other authors do what I'm trying to do and then incorporating that skill into my writing. With that in mind, and knowing her experience can help other writers, I've interviewed author Linda Weaver Clarke about her newest novel, The Mysterious Doll, and especially about her writing process.
Me: Thank you for joining me on my blog today, Linda. I'm sure your experience and insight will be a great help to readers. Throughout my career, I've found that one of the first questions aspiring authors ask me is where I get my ideas, so why don't we begin with that? Please tell us a little about your new novel and where  your idea for this book came from.
 

Linda: The Amelia Moore Detective Series is a cozy mystery that involves missing persons. So I try to create a story around a missing person and make it intriguing at the same time. I’m not sure where I get my ideas. I just think about an area that I would like to set my next story and then try to come up with a story that would fit that area. In this story, Amelia and Rick end up at Estes Park, Colorado in the famous Stanley Hotel that is supposedly “haunted.” I stayed at this hotel once with my husband and daughter and it was such a fun experience. And no, I didn’t see any ghosts while I was there. But I did see the famous Stanley Steamer Automobile.

In The Mysterious Doll, Pauline Jones is confused why her boyfriend took off without telling a soul where he was going. But that isn’t all. Sam Whitaker is accused of stealing a valuable porcelain doll from the museum. His disappearance makes him look guilty, but Pauline is convinced he is innocent. When Amelia finds Sam, she realizes they need to prove his innocence. Where is the antique doll and who has taken it?

Me: How do you put your stories together? Do you plot first, or do you begin with a nugget of an idea and let the story take you where it will?

Linda: I usually plot first because with a mystery you have to know the ending and help your characters get there Lwithout the reader knowing the secret. Afterwards I’ll add fillers to my story as I write. So in a sense, I guess I also “let the story take me where it will.”

Me: That's exactly what I do too. Great minds think alike--grin. Now, I know there are a lot of elements you "do right" in your books, but you would you please tell us what  one writing skill you consider to be your best? Hpw did you develop it?

Linda: Description is my strength. When I first began writing, my editor would tell me to add more description so my reader would understand what my hero or heroine looked like. Also, what kind of mountains were they looking at in the distance as the couple strolled along the path? With this encouragement, I worked at it until it became second nature to me. I made my weakness become my strength. How do I know this is my strength? Because I’ve had many reviewers comment that they could actually feel as if they were in the area my story took place because of my descriptions. I try not to overdo it, though. Just enough to help my reader imagine they are there.

Me: Along with that, what characteristics do you strive to include in every book by Linda Weaver Clarke?

Linda: I try to include humor, some romance, and intrigue. Those are my favorite types of books to read, so I want to include it in my stories.
 

Me: Finally, I believe it's important for writers to know what they hope readers will get from their books. What do you hope readers will get from The Mysterious Doll?

Linda: Fun and entertainment. If a reader loves romantic cozy mysteries, then this book is right up their alley. What is a cozy mystery? It’s a G-rated story. Usually the sleuth is an intelligent woman who must solve the case.  Most mysteries are about solving a crime, but this new series involves missing persons. 

Me: Thank you so much for visiting with us today, Linda, and Congratulations on your new book. 

Click here to purchase The Mysterious Doll from Amazon.

Must Have #2--Clarity

A couple of weeks ago, I began a series of posts that defines my "Must Haves" in writing. Most of them come from Gary Provost's 1984 article, "The Seven Beacons of Excellent Writing," and the first was Brevity. Today, it's Clarity.

At this point in my career, clarity is the Must Have I'm most conscious of. Far too often, I find myself plugging away at my writing, knowing exactly what is going on with my characters and plot, and yet when I receive feedback on it from other authors, I get this question: "Huh?" That response tells me I haven't said exactly what I mean, and I must now go back through the section and rewrite it until it is clear.

To quote Provost: "the good writer makes his meaning as clear as possible. He leaves no room for doubt about what is being read and he is not vague except when he has a good reason (bold & italics added)."

Here are a few clarifying tips:

1. Replace pronouns with exact nouns if appropriate. Instead of writing "He put it over there," write "Tom put the garden hose under the oak tree."

2. Tell the reader right up front who is doing what and when. For instance, don't write a sentence like this as your opening line or throughout your opening paragraphs:

He opened the package, and when he saw what was inside, he collapsed.

Sometimes new writers believe vagueness creates suspense, but the truth is, it may irritate and will probably confuse the reader.

3. While it's important to avoid repetition whenever possible, don't be afraid to repeat for clarification. For instance, if you write "Mom and Susan went to Broulims. She bought some furniture polish," your reader might not know who "She" is. Instead, write your second sentence as "Susan bought some furniture polish." This is also important in dialogue. If you're not sure your reader will know who's talking, repeat the speaker's name as much as necessary.

4. Finally, being direct is okay. Good, even. I don't know why, perhaps it's due to my poetry training or my school, literary, reading studies, but whatever the reason, I sometimes find myself alluding to my meaning, rather than saying straight out what I mean. When I do this, my readers's responses always contain, "Huh?"

Like I said before, that response is not a good thing, and I then know it's time to rewrite. To clarify.

My Writing Must Haves #1--Brevity

A couple of years ago, I posted about how I use lists to help me stay focused on the nuts and bolts of writing. One of the most important of those lists I keep for easy reference on the wall directly behind my computer monitor. I've simply titled it: "My Writing Must Haves," but in actuality, I adapted it from an article I read several years ago by acclaimed author, Gary Provost. It was titled "The Seven Beacons of Excellent Writing."


Because "My Writing Must Haves" list has been so helpful to me, I've decided to write a series of blogs discussing each point on it. The first is Brevity.


Gary Provost began his discussion of brevity (tight writing) with this statement: "When you write and rewrite, don't think about what you can put in. Think about what you can leave out."


Since magazines require writers to say a great deal in very few words, I initially believed this advice mostly applied to that media. However, after Missing was accepted and later as I went through an extensive revision process, I learned that brevity is also important to novel writing. Think about it. Haven't you read novels in which you were at least tempted to skip over sections, sometimes even pages, of an author's prose because it was boring or redundant? I have, and every time it wasn't because the author's story line was boring; it was because the writing was too bogged down with words that didn't carry their weight. So on my list, next to "Brevity," I've written this definition: "include only words that are necessary."


How do we do that? Again, borrowing from Provost, I'll end with three, "brief" tips:

1. Stick to your subject matter; i.e., the specific slant of your article or the goal of your story. Don't wander down unimportant paths or dally in unnecessary information.

2. Begin at the beginning, where the story takes off or where your character's life changes in relation to the plot, and not a moment sooner.

3. Eliminate unnecessary words. I've discussed one way to do this here.

So that's it. Write tight and check back soon. My next post in this series will focus on "Clarity."

What They Did Right--Traci Hunter Abramson

I just finished reading Traci Hunter Abramson's novel, "The Deep End," and while there are many things she "did right," the writing tool I'd like to discuss here is "Details."

As I said in an earlier post, "god"--ultimate power and influence over our readers--is in the details. Don't believe me? Try this test: Pull out your favorite novel, flip to a beloved scene, perhaps one you've read and reread dozens of times, and see how many sensual (sight, sound, taste, touch, etc) details the author gave you as they painted that scene for you. I'll wager there are a lot. That's because the best way to bring characters/scenes to life is to infuse them with details.

Since Abramson did such a good job with her details, especially those related to swimming, I thought I'd add a few of them here as an example:

From the last paragraph of her prologue:
"Excruciating pain filled his ears as he struggled upward. Logically, he knew that his body couldn't handle the rapid ascent, but panic and survival instinct took over. He even managed to delude himself that maybe he could survive after all, since the only pain was in his ears and sinuses rather than his chest. He held his breath, his head now throbbing as a tingling sensation crept along his skin. . . "

From page 151:
"When the comand came to take her mark, she gripped the font of the starting block and every muscle in her body tensed. At the starting buzzer, her body responded instinctively, stretching out over the water in a racing dive. The shock of the cold water enveloped her and she moved through the water with rapid dophin kicks. . . ."

And near the end:
"With a silent prayer and a rush of adrenaline, she reached up, wrapped her fingers around the doorknob of the adjoining closet, and burst out into the hallway. . . The shout behind her didn't slow her down, nor did the approaching footsteps. Then a gunshot echoed . . ."

Abramson used "taste" throughout her book, too, for CJ (her main character) is more than an olympic swimmer; she's also a cook. I'm still wishing I could ask her for her blueberry scones recipe.

Nail it with Details

So, we have a blueprint, some materials, and even a few tools. Are we ready to build our dream house? Not quite. We still need something to fasten it together with, like nails. Or in this case, since we’re talking about building stories, details.

Soon after we purchased our “lot,” we ended up in a legal battle with one of our neighbors. While discussing our situation with our lawyer, he said, “The devil is in the details.” When it comes to the law, this phrase may be true, but with writing, it’s not the devil that’s in the details, it’s god. Not God, our Father in Heaven, nor His Son, I’m not speaking of deity here, but I am saying that exact, concrete details have the power to lift our writing to a higher plane because they “create”—fasten—specific images and emotions in the minds of our readers.

For example, if the hero of your story is a fisherman who has fallen in love with a farmer’s daughter, it would put a much stronger image and emotion in your reader’s mind, if you have him say to her, “Your hair sparkles like the coastline after a storm,” rather than, “Your hair looks good.”

Similarly, a porcelain-faced, china doll; a multi-patched, sock puppet; or a “Red Rider B-B gun” will not only create exact images, but will also imply object-specific emotions. For instance, when I picture the china doll, I think of grace, refinement, and quiet. The sock puppet? Love. The B-B gun? A mixture of laughter and sadness—all the emotions related to the movie, “A Christmas Story.”

Now, I have a challenge for you. At rondagibbhinrichsen.com, I have posted a few pictures from my recent trip to Beijing, China. I have also listed a few, non-specific adjectives which a less conscientious writer might use to describe them. See if you can do better. And you know, I’d love to hear some of your ideas!